Hello hello,
I’ve recently come to accept that there are no new ideas in this world – everything is repackaged. This is particularly prevalent to me right now because so many current fads happen to be things that have a long history (maybe this is true of all fads???). A couple examples:
- A few popular scientists are telling us to spend 20 minutes facing the sun at dawn to establish our circadian rhythms and draw energy for the day. Hello! – 3500 years of Vedic practice has already established the benefits of this activity
- Sauna-ing and cold plunging – the Nordic countries have been doing this since 1112 AD! This is not a new trend with recently discovered health benefits despite
While I have many sarcastic jokes here, I don’t actually have malice toward the propagators of these old ideas which are repackaged as new – we all think we’re discovering something new (myself included!). And it’s not totally wrong – in fact, it’s sort of comforting. These things are new to us, and there’s a new application to the present day. It’s comforting because it shows the cyclical nature of our collective wisdom as a species.
Which leads to be the biggest example of all (at least in my opinion). Therapy. After the informal ‘research’ I’ve conducted on this topic, I’m not sure how to distill this down. Across white America, therapy has become an essential and lucrative enterprise over the last 50 years. And… it’s becoming apparent that our culture has created this vast market for therapy which is not to take away from how necessary is it. But… I will entertain the idea that it may be a manufactured market?
I think we’re seeing the result of American culture having over exaggerated the importance of individualism for a couple hundred years. I’m biased here because I’ve married into a culture that is very different than white American culture. One easy example – to me, cooking can feel like a burden. Standing alone in the kitchen pulling random stuff from the fridge to piece together a meal for the kids is the definition of a chore (to me). But, if I could cook with my closest 5 friends for a few hours while bitching about everything and everyone… that’s a different experience. That’s the experience of women all over the globe – gathering for hours with cousins, neighbors, aunts, siblings… talking and joking and singing – isn’t that therapy?
Only in America have we removed the inherent benefits of community from daily life.
I’ll give another example which highlights my privilege. I regularly get manicures from my favorite nail salon. There’s a rich history of the nail salon industry in the US and the connections to Vietnam- check it out here: https://www.npr.org/2019/05/19/724452398/how-vietnamese-americans-took-over-the-nails-business-a-documentary
Here’s what I know… when I’m in the nail salon, there’s no doubt about the sense of community created in the small space. Women laughing, discussing, and disagreeing in their native tongue about all aspects of life. I’m always attempting to insert myself into the strong sense of community in these spaces. #whiteprivilege. Seriously, I’m an outsider trying to understand and become a part of this micro-community… because it’s human nature to want to belong! It’s another beautiful example of therapy in the wild.
Ultimately, the antidote to loneliness is a shared purpose as a community. We were designed to understand and act on this shared purpose as a species – we’ve moved so far away from this basic principle that’s it’s started to become novel. It’s so novel, we don’t look to our community to fulfill this basic human need- we have to sign up for individual therapy.
Let’s add another layer – we’re learning more and more about the importance of the brain-body connection (PLEASE check out Gabor Mate’s work – here’s a great Armchair Expert episode where he talks about some of his work:
https://armchairexpertpod.com/pods/gabor-mate
One aspect of the brain-body connection is exercise. Exercise is seriously a panacea for physical and mental ailments. So, what do we know? The connection with other humans and moving our bodies are both essential to our species…
So… no wonder I routinely wish I was dancing at the club?! Physical exertion among a group of people who are sharing the same experience?! Heaven. It could be quite possibly the highest form of therapy, and if we take a global look, no wonder there’s lasting power in traditional Indigenous dancing, African tribal dances, Zumba classes at the local gym, even the YMCA dance at white people weddings!
So of course all of my most joyous moments have been dancing at the club or dancing at Cameroonian events. These are the moments I try to recreate alone with my Airpods turned up to maximum volume. #investinhearingaids
Consider this a universal Rx for us all: Move your body in unison with your community. That’s it – that might actually be the answer.
-Jessica