Hello hello,
If you haven’t heard, Anderson Cooper has a new podcast series that is focused on grief. I can’t be trusted to objectively assess the quality of this podcast because I’m already obsessed with AC (at least I can admit it!). I’ve loved him since he was on Channel 1 which we watched in high school at the beginning of each school day! #throwback [In case you’re curious, Channel 1 ended in May 2018… #rip #speakingofgrief] I’ve also loved him on CNN, his NYE show with Andy Cohen, and his segments on 60 Minutes. I fully acknowledge that this places me in a very old, very white demographic, but I have to accept this. I’ve even purchased and read his book about the history of his Vanderbilt family (highly recommend!!)
However you feel about Anderson Cooper, the TV personality, you can’t deny his personal experience with loss: his dad died when he was 10, his brother died by suicide at 23 (AC was 21), and in 2019 his very famous mother, Gloria Vanderbilt, died at 95. He’s now alone with his memories and the monumental task of scouring through all of the physical remnants from his family. All of this to say, check out his new podcast about grief:
https://www.cnn.com/audio/podcasts/all-there-is-with-anderson-cooper
This series on grief reminds me of a song from one of my favorite artists/poets – Dessa:
She has a song called “Good Grief” which is just genius. When we’re exasperated, we actually exclaim, ‘good grief!!’ [minimally, this is a very Scandinavian expression in the Midwest- I grew up with this expression as part of the vernacular: e.g. “Can you believe he burnt the toast? “Good grief!!”]. What do we mean when we express this? What part of grief could be good?
Is there a difference between despair and grief? Can we find a reason or vehicle to convert our despair/grief into the ‘good’ kind. I don’t know, but that’s where I start wondering about Dessa’s lyrics:
“They say there’s good grief
But how can you tell it from the bad?
Maybe it’s only in the fact
Good grief’s the one that’s in your past
I got snow in my pockets
Went down again head first
Laced drill bits to my pointe shoes
Pirouette through the hardwood to paydirt
Night falls, day breaks, time
Has a funny kind of violence and I’m
Tryna keep in mind
It can’t leave you the way it finds you
Good grief:
I’ve heard people say it
What a phrase, what a state to be in
But I don’t know where they go to get get
That feeling
Good grief
And my knees stay clean
Not much for praying
I do my own stunts and my own saving
But there’s something amiss
Something I been missing maybe maybe…”
Please, if you have a chance, see Dessa in person. She is a level of accessible genius that we all take for granted.
Happy holiday season – talk soon
Jessica
#powertoprivilege #blacklivesmatter #courageousconversations